Do you ever have so much work to do, so many bills to pay, so many errands to run, so many people to get in touch with, so much reading to do for class, and so many chores you cannot get to, you get sort of glassy-eyed and spend the day re-organizing your bookshelves, deciding once more that you definitely, seriously, no-kidding, need an entirely new apartment?
No? Just me?
I don’t know what’s going on with me. I’m so restless. I need a new view!
Getting antsy like this feels familiar. It’s a thing with me. My family and longtime friends — and certainly a few boyfriends — would all attest that yes, Mary needs to reinvent, flip the script, change the mood from time to time.
My need for a literal and figurative fresh coat of paint is evidenced by my fondness for fashion and by the many different things I have done with my hair over the years. Need a new perspective? Get a new pair of shoes! Want a different view? Go blonde! Trust me, everything looks different when you go from brunette to blonde — at least for awhile.
I guess I feel like life moves so fast and everything changes so quickly, I’m hardly the same person I was even just six months ago, let alone seven years ago, when I bought this place. Remember New York and Washington? Love fueled that adventure, but if I were a person who didn’t like to change her view, I wouldn’t have gone. You’d better believe I was looking for a change of scenery as much as I was looking for the love of my life. It’s just how I am.
Now that graduation approaches, now that I see (and am over-the-moon excited by) the work before me in the quilt world and beyond, I look around at my seven-year-old couch and my aren’t-they-awfully-tiny windows and my kitchen floor that I never finished and my damned dishwasher that now needs to be replaced and I think, “Fons, you’ve outgrown this place.”
And I can’t get a dog here. It’s a no-dogs-allowed building. So my lil’ Philip Larkin can never be, as long as I live here. (I hereby promise to give you all a Philip update within the week; there are several things to discuss.)
The only way it could work is if I found renters for this place whose occupancy would cover the costs of anything else I’d move into. I want a new view bad enough to poke around online and dream about such things, but this is nothing that can happen right now, I’m afraid. First things first: Graduate from school. Start paying loans. Go from part-time work to full-time. Deal with whatever it is inside of me that I don’t want to deal with so instead I’m looking to live in a different apartment. Do that first.
And then.
And then?
Sam
Oh MARY, we all feel just like you do. I daydream of reinventing my life and surroundings. My friend sold her house and has moved to Kauai. We must keep dreaming and aspiring. Sam
Sherry Grijalva
Move to Phoenix! We would love to have you here!!
Brenda King
Mary, I understand your restlessness and need for a change of view. Even places we love can eventually become boring, and less uplifting, as time goes by, and our needs and wants change. I wish you the very best luck in finding a wonderful renter and the perfect new abode! Please keep us posted as you make your change! LOVE YOUR BLOG! : ) Brenda King
Barbara
You need to take a break and come to The Mountain Quiltfest in Pigeon Forge later this month. It’s fabulous! You can lose yourself in just admiring the close to 500 quilts on display, not to mention the vendors, classes, events and fellow QUILTERS! Come join us!! Maybe it will cure your ‘itch’ for change…for a little while, at least!
Barbara Schmidt
V.P. Seymour Quilt Club
Sevierville, TN
Lynette Walters
Oh, it isn’t just me that does this? I just finished classes at our local community college and I am starting at University of Maryland. BUT instead of starting on my reading for school, I continued sewing seams and ironing a quilt for one of my daughters. The quilt is all in shades of orange, her favorite color. Ironing is very therapeutic, that is the biggest well kept secret.
Susan
You have the same gypsy in your soul that I struggle with. Feed her and she will teach you and treat you well, try to ignore her and risk losing a tiny piece of your spirit. xoxo
Lindsey
Try rearranging your furniture and putting pretty throws on your sofa and chairs. It’s the changing of the seasons and the quality of the light is making us notice things differently. In my case it’s time to dust (a euphemism for removing layers) and wash windows. Remember ‘spring cleaning’? This need for change happens to me now and then. If I change a few colors and get everything tidied up I can wait for this urge to pass. I really think it is the changing of the quality of the light.
Of course, I could be nuts!
Susan K
I think your right Lindsey!! More daylight makes the dust and grime more visible! Also a new view, clearer view may also be in order! In our living space and life!
susan
Absolutely, I also agree about the change in the light. Also the dirty winter windows. sigh
Karen
At our house, this simply means that March has come!! I used to threaten to tie my husband to the bedpost the minute spring arrived because inevitably he wanted to change jobs, cars, AND houses then. (But fortunately for me, not wives 😉 ) And sometimes we did change one or all three, most often with good results. It’s probably the reason that stick-in-the-mud me was attracted to Mr. Adventuresome in the first place! I think the lesson here is for you to start looking for that stick-in-the-mud guy who secretly wishes for an adventuresome girl like you — works for us!
Becky Garten
I think you have a case of “Almost Done with School-itis”. The excitement is too much to handle and the pent up energy is ready to explode. Hold on. You’ll make it.
Barbara
Mary, I know how much you love Iowa. Why don’t you get a place with a beautiful view of the Decorah Eagles Nest in naturally, Decorah, Iowa. I watch online and have been for quite a few years, but to see all this in person, wow, what a view!!!!
Glenda
Try fostering a dog first. With the travel you will be doing and new restrictions on “emotional” animals, you may not have the time to spend with a pup or dog. Or have a neightbor who loves to do sit. A dog takes so much time compared to a cat. As far as wanting a specific breed—-I struggle with that also.
Molly
Mary thank you so much for writing this. I’ve been struggling with the same thing for weeks now. So much work to do for school and personal projects. It’s so overwhelming so I’ve be been avoiding my apartment! Fabric shopping, going with friends, etc. The first time this hit me hard I almost left my husband! But you’re right, doing the things I’ve been avoiding is absolutely the answer. I always feel so much better and calm down after it’s done. And I feel accomplished!
Also I love how you ended this. “And then” is such an inspiring ending. And then what? And then all the other exciting projects I’ve had to put off too finish my school projects! And then anything!!
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